The New Couches

A week or so ago I came home and our couches were gone. I was hoping they had been stolen, but blackwifeo patiently explained that she had sent them out for recovering, apparently with my blessing. I vaguely recalled a phone call in the middle of a meeting at work, where I mumbled something about do whatever seems right to you. Seems I gave my blessing and the couches were off to be resurfaced.

Now the old couches, while comfortable, were pretty much used up. The dozen or so cats, kids and nephews had pretty much beaten them up over the last few years. And while I still think we should have waited for all the children in the extended family to go off to college (20 years or so), recovering them seemed more green than buying anew. So, we spent a week sitting on the floor and fighting over the two rocking chairs, until the new and renewed couches showed up a few days before they were expected - this reinforced the fact that clearly we had grossly overpaid. Blackwifeo was ecstatic. They looked good and the upholstering dude clearly knew his craft. She sat on them, admired them, and would have slept downstairs to guard them if it was at all practical.

Now the cats. Well, the cats were interested in these new red scratching posts. Blackwifeo promptly banished them from the lounge and shooed them outside. They cried they shouted: "Who's house is it anyway" and "This is inhumane, we know our rights". So, late that night, someone must have let them in and guess what, one of the little monsters took his claws for a test run. If you look closely at the bottom right in the picture below, you can see the frayed ends of the fabric where the dastardly deed took place.

But it you look closer still, behind the couch outside the window, Sid is pleading to come in. He runs his claws up and down the glass, emitting a fingernail on blackboard type shriek. He told us he is going to write to B'Tzelem and lodge a complain with the UN. Blackwifeo was ready to murder them all, but to their credit, one of the feline gang caught a huge rat last night and left it outside on Blackwifeo's smoking swing as a peace offering. She was not amused.