Sunday, March 8, 2009

The Food Of Life

I know I'm straying from the 80%ness of life again, but I need an intervention. I just cannot stop eating. I don't know what's wrong with me. As I've expounded many times before, when you reach middle age (I think I have a year or two before old age), all that seems to matter is food. Gone is sex, and drugs and rock and roll, and life revolves around a nice whole wheat roll with that black wax edged cheese and some fresh red pepper, tomato, salt and pepper. Currently I'm eating my own body weight each day. I cannot stop. Each morning I wake up and swear to myself that today, its fruit and vegetables. But by the time the 10am tea break comes along I've already polished off half a circle of Peppered Boursin on Lachmit, chocolate covered wafers (I don't even like them particularly), those strawberry jam filled cookies, a granola bar and a banana, apple and orange. What's going on?

To compound the problem, I hardly walked (or should we say waddled) last week due to the visitors from "overseas" and the rain. This gluttony has got to stop or else I'm going to force myself back to the "Raanana Religious Woman's Weight Watchers Group From Hell". I will be forced to sit in a circle and talk about the tastiness of non-fat yogurt and how one hypnotizes oneself through 100 NIS donations and Buddhist chants, into believing that roasted cauliflower tastes as good as potato chips (yeah right). This is becoming a big problem. How do you stop eating?


Ed said...

My roasted cauliflower recipe is unstoppable. It's not potato chips but it's about as good as you can get.

It's key to use a heavy cookie sheet for it.

1) Cut a cauliflower head into eighths wedges.
2) Paint liberally each cut edge and the outside florets with olive oil and sprinkle with kosher or sea salt and fresh pepper.
3) Flip carefully and repeat to the other side.
4) Cover the cookie sheet with tin foil completely and bake for 10 minutes at 475 F.
5) Take the tin foil off and cook another 8 minutes or so. Then flip the pieces. It should be browned.
6) Another 8 to 10 minutes on the other side to brown.

It's about as good as you're gonna get. The key is the 10 minutes with the tin foil on to soften it up.

Anonymous said...

You have to figure out "what's eating at you." Sometimes people eat to fill an emptiness that has nothing to do with their stomach. Too often a person self-medicates with food. Could it be you want something you're not getting and the "hunger" persists because the need is not being fulfilled, so you mistakenly associate all hunger with a need for food?

If you read your blog entries again, from beginning to end, I have a strong feeling that you'd see your problem, written in your own words.

Freud would say "Hey, dude, you know what's eating at you. So fix it before you eat yourself to death." (I'm paraphrasing. It's hard channelling this dude.

Now, gird up your loins and do the right thing. (I channel Moses occasionally. Or maybe it's Mozelle. She tends to talk loud and she sounds like Bea Arthur.)

Work it out blackman. You're almost there.

John Deuel said...

As I recall, you had a toast fetish even back when you were young.

blackpetero said...

I'm always honored when such respected citizen's like Anonymous, Eddie and John comment. I am touched. I still love toast. And hey anonymous, all that channeling must leave you famished. Have a bagel for me.