Wednesday, April 8, 2009

80% Robbed

bno here, with an unfortunate update from the bho (blackhomeo).

Monday night I worked late, only leaving Squint East (we're east of Squint Central) at 10:30pm. On my drive home, (in bpo's bpo (blackpriuso)) bpo's mobile mobile phone started ringing. I looked at it for a second, and saw that it was bso. I figured he wanted to talk to his father, left the phone alone, and continued home.

Upon arriving at home, I was greeted by a wide open front door. The first thought in my head was that bso got mis-routed and instead of the Hungarian rendezvous, he wound up in Ra'anana, free to carry out his life in his typical, non-door closing, manner. I also noticed that every light upstairs was had been switched on. I ran into the house, put down my bag, and flew up the stairs. It was when I saw this that I knew strange things were afoot at the circle k:
I looked to the right and saw a disasterous mess in the parents bedroom. Now those of you regular-readers of the blog will know that we are not the cleanest of families, but the mess I was looking at easily rivaled some of our no-housekeeper days. In fact, it made the 'parents-are-away-on-holiday' days from this past fall, seem spic-and-span.

I didn't know what to do, so followed the most logical option... and had a freak-out. Then I called bpo, whose 1st words were, 'Call Ari." His second words were, "Call the police." I called blackario who stopped what he was doing, presumably lying in his bed getting ready for slumber, got dressed and was here in 10 minutes.

At this point, I would like to state that blackario will from here-on out be referred to as goldario, as the man is golden. Those of you who wish to protest can come and take it up with me, the self appointed Sahr-Betachon (Minister of Security). He called th police for me, he interpereted to the police (once they arrived), he organized the next-day's events of the Gil Grissom fingerprinting team arrival, and handled the appraiser, too. There is nothing goldario can't handle. Etiquette and protocol must be his primary functions and he is versed in 2 forms of communication.

The blackin-lawso came over as well, and we went looking around the house. Here are some snaps of what we found. I was told to keep it mild, as the family is still on vacation, and I don't want to alarm them. But, I know this family. They're as tough as nails and can handle anything.

3 weeks ago I returned from the US, in my bag was $900+ dollars worth of computer parts. Once again, my cousin, who can't have anything just out of the box, constructed a megolithic computer. it could have been named 'The Computer to End all Computers', or at least, 'Deep Tought.' The computer had a close kinship with Franken-pedal. What was the boy's project ended up being started, executed, and completed by bpo. My heart goes out to my cousin, I'm sorry for your loss.

Now we'll have a look at the office:

Note the one flat panel monitor is still here. They took the other monitor. They took a flat-panel monitor from the upstairs 'office' why leave this one? Which is a great question to start our segueway into the 80%ness of this robbery. I understand that they stole the items that can be turned over and sold quick, but some serious booty was left behind. Strange things we noticed:

1) These goons didn't enter the kitchen. The didn't take our fresh strawberries that we intentionally hide in the back of the fridge.

2)If there is no toilet paper or q-tips when the bfo return home... it wasn't me!

3) Some of the most important items were left behind, include a wireless router in the bedroom (it's twin in the basement was taken), my external hard drive, my ipod nano, and my camera. It's all my stuff, because I don't venture upstairs too often, so don't know what my family members own, and may still own.

Needless to say, the show must go on.

The whole extended family came over last night, they cleaned up, reorganized, and put the house back together. These guys are fantastic. I would like to take an opportunity to thank them all. If it wasn't for the backin-lawso (and goldario) I wouldn't have known what to do. They are an incredible family, and once again, in the last couple of days, I have been reminded of the power of a close family. A billion thank yous.

In the tradition of 9/11, 'If we don't have our passover seder in this house, then the terrorists have won.'

Posted from my horrible, horrible IBM Thinkpad, nick-named The Hyundai Getz. I want my MacBookPro back!!


SB said...

PS - If your keys don't work when you get home, it's because the newly appointed Sahr Betachon has changed the locks. I have a few more plans in store after completing my safety inspection, but cannot jeopardize the integrity of the homestead at this juncture, it wouldn't be prudent.

Greta said...

And we thought America was the high crime capital of the world.
Happy pesach Stevie, and youall out there.

Scarlet said...


If that was my parents house, they'd be freaking out and coming home right about now.

What really struck me in this is how the whole family showed up like a bunch of superheroes to help.

Thinking of everyone.

blackpetero said...

I have to say that even though I give my in-laws a hard time, they are awesome in a crisis. They truly came through this time. We came home to a house that was tidier than we left. They worked like Trojans to get it all together. No amount of thanks can ever convey our gratitude.