Thursday, March 11, 2010

The Dark

It's early Friday morning. The house, including six seven cats (Sid, Nancy, Lola, Mazda, Edison and Montgomery, and Marmalade) is dreaming peacefully. Now I want you to know, it's not just the blog I have been neglecting of late. No, I'm an equal opportunity ignorer. More than half the lights on the kitchen level are dead and have not been replaced - bso, the replacement of bulbs is his job, claims there are no replacements down-down stairs. You can't even walk into to down-down stair. Bwo started "organizing" a few weeks back, and now has a job, so it looks like I will have to get stuck in. I have not even touched a guitar, in raw or finished, form for months - this is not good.

I wonder if I have taken on too much here. On the one hand I love my studies. I love the feeling of clearing the fog in my mind about the way things worked in the past. I love the challenge of looking at some barely incomprehensible project or paper outline and working slowly over weeks until it becomes clear and I make it mine. Still, the guilty feeling of "wasting" time, when I'm not working or studying, is something I was happy to leave behind at college graduation. It has returned with a vengeance. I really can't complain. My days are full, and the weeks are flying by. Flying by way too quickly in fact.

Another thing I have given up is the radio. I used to be a fanatical news hound. I listened to "news radio" on the way into work in the morning and back at night. I was plugged into exactly what was happening and what it sounded like. Now, I am listening to the complex reasons behind the fall of the Hittite Empire and why ancient Greek art was unique. I can look at the embarrassing antics of our Foreign Minister and just shrug. I can watch this ridiculous government pretend they want peace while strengthening the West Bank and smile. It is so much easier to remain somewhat in the dark - maybe that's why I'm in no rush to change the living room light bulbs.

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