Thursday, October 23, 2008

Service please.

I am sorry to tell you that today master black will not be able to make it BPO is busy exploring the deep mystical parts of the world , and since he already used all the talented Bloggers he knew , in last desperate move he wandered into the squints room and said
"ok guys its either 10 hours mining in the coal mines or writing my Blog." i was too slow at running to the mines.

The good news I think i had figured out why things in the holy land will never be more then 80% , its the human factor! (hey hold off with the tomatoes and let me explain)

If you ever flied in El Al you probably know this feeling , Its been 8 hours you are squeezed between a lady who entered the plane through the cargo bay , and a little kid (monster) who like to sing and hit stuff. your lips are cracked and you will sell your soul for a glass of water. pushing that the little button with the lady drawing for three hours resulted with nothing, so in a desperate final struggle you get up and squeeze yourself to the ayle (the lady insist there is no reason for her to get up) and crawl to the stawertest post , there you are greeted with ice cold look and an explanation that you should return to your sit and they will address you immediately (its not safe to stand in the plane unless you passed the harsh stawertest training) and while you try to explain that according to Geneva you are entitled to one glass of water , you understand there is no hope and you will have to grab the glass of water when no one is looking.

Okey , planes are harsh environment , lets try restaurants . All Israeli waitress come with an amazing ability to ignore you . you can stand on one foot juggle and put your hair on fire , if they don't want they will not notice. in addition always the longest part of the meal will be waiting for balance and paying. and even if you come noon in workday paying with Cibus (special card that company's supply their workers to feed them when they wish - that little experience with trough proved to be too messy) they will insist about inquiring everyone about that special deserts , and look at you disapproving when you decline polity. in addition they will never accept tip in credit , which will force you to acquire and carry a lot of small coins every day (can be heavy you know!) oh and tip is required , because most of the poor bastereds don't even get payed (but thats for another post). last but not least , unlike the real world waitressing is not a real job , its something that people have to do for a short period of time to finance something , and yes it shows.

Next shopping , you are (dragged screaming and twisting) into another cloth shop talking with the friend/sibling/spouse with you , and while you on the verge of curing cancer an inhuman high pitched voice interrupt and say "can i help you ?" you polity nod for no since you know that the only opinion that count is that of the said friend/sibling/spouse and she already complained about the seller horrible test in something , you move away to another shelve , then a familiar head pop between the racks and ask , "are you sure you don't require any help?" after signing on three copy's that indeed you are certain , you move along . Alas mysteriously about three steps to the back the said cleric is busy soothing some sort of overpriced cloth , you can run jump dodge nothing will change , she is there with annoyed look on her face. the only proven way to shake this stalker is to turn around and say "hey can you help me with a question".

and don't get me started on costumer service people ...
you will run through the same script each time you call .

CSdude: "please reboot your modem , and turn off your pc",
Me: "Mate are you sure its gonna help , i see smoke fire and little devils running around" CSdude: "now click on start , command , and type ..." ,
Me: "the room is spinning "

Companys insist they will know absolutely nothing about their job, i offered to teach my friend who had the doubtful pleasure of working in Costumer service some basics , he looked at me horrified and told me that he almost got fired for reading a technical book on his job while having a quiet hour. his manager told him : "What the hell are you doing ?next time you are fired ! play solliter."


and will never admit defeat .

CSdude: " of course i understand gyroprofiamstupid mechanic. what do you think me for?
anyhow i am too old for your stupid tests just do as i say. please reboot your
modem, and turn off your pc"

and will have zero grasp on reality,

CSdude: "ok log into our site click on the left "
Me: " but sir.."
CSdude: "please let me finish , ok on our site there is this little bar"
Me: "i think that you forgetting"
CSdude: "*ahm* on that menu click on the third button and it will solve everything"
Me: "I have no Internet."
CSdude: "ok i will send it to your mail"


oh sorry my point , if there is one thing an Israeli hate the most is feeling they getting less then they payed for . they prefer dying . so if you payed to do a service why do more then the minimum ? you will be fraier (sucker)

so serving for the porpouse of making another happy is against the nature for us , all said personal above have the simple of having zero pride in their job , misplaced loyality to the place they serve, and its just not in our nature to do something for a stranger without a reason ... "fraier" .
and when you keep getting 80% why would you put 100% ... vicious circle.

thanks for listening to my rambling , you really deserve a medal if you read that far
Haflo out.

1 comment:

Yuval said...

Cool post - good work!